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By Victoria (Tori) Martinez Before chronic illness visited me, I saw the holidays the way they are often painted: bright, sparkling, full of energy and a time for celebration. But now that I am living with chronic illness and chronic pain, the holiday season isn’t always filled with moments of joy. The extra noise, extra time planning for travel, the unrealistic expectations we can place on our bodies, having to cancel social plans, and the sensory overload can push my alread

By Victoria (Tori) Martinez   I walked in the door of my house about seven months ago, and I felt like a ghost. I was going through the motions of daily life but without emotion. And in that moment, I realized that's not the way I want to live life. I had to make some pretty hard decisions, life changing decisions, changing the big plan for my future. I think at some point we all come to that crossroads of choosing to continue living life the way we have been or choosing some

By Victoria (Tori) Martinez   I recently found myself standing in a room filled with other writers. In that moment, I felt my present self being reintroduced to my younger self while also picturing myself in the future. I was a keynote speaker for this same writer’s retreat when it first started, and here I was again, a different year, different writers, and a different me.   As I led them through each writing prompt and we worked through the tangle of thoughts and deeply sea

By Victoria (Tori) Martinez After I was diagnosed with a chronic illness, I decided that for a year I would journal about my journey. I wrote each page as if it were a letter to myself or my children and we could one day look back on and see how far I had come. I had hope of healing, hope of being cured.   That was over a decade ago. I picked up that old journal recently and took a walk down memory lane. It was an emotional walk. I’ve had highs and lows. I’ve experienced beau